I think I’ll live

My ‘Nuclear Stress Test’ was today. The only bad part was the no caffeine for 24 hours prior rule. Not that I consume that much anyway, but just the idea of not being able to have an Iced Mocha yesterday if the mood hit me was a drag. But that’s not why I’m happy to be alive. (not that it shows)

The real reason can be explained this way. My father died of colon cancer run amok in 1985 at age 60. “Too young” I was often told by those who knew him. He fully retired less that two years prior from 33 years in the Postal Service and 4 years military duty during World War Two. After his death I hadn’t given much thought to living beyond that age myself. Over the years I’ve done well financially and managed to put away quite a bit of money for retirement, I just never believed I’d be around to spend it and figured my heirs would make out rather well. One day I was telling my financial advisor about my father and he said he finally understood my reluctance to discuss long term goals.

Starting in my late 40’s my doctor started getting after me to have certain tests done based on family history. Once I hit the magic ’50’ number he really put the pressure on until I gave in this week. I wasn’t worried about the procedure itself, it was the results I dreaded. But I finally decided it was the right thing to do and so on Monday of this week I had a colonoscopy.

For anyone unfamiliar with modern medicine let me say Versed is an A*M*A*Z*I*N*G drug. During the prep work I asked what sedative was to be used. Versed was the answer and was told it caused amnesia. (they weren’t kidding) After all the prep they wheeled me into the procedure room where the doctor introduced himself and went over a few things. Then the doctor told the nurse to inject me. I remember very clearly they had me roll over onto my left side and raise my knees and…POOF!, I’m opening my eyes in the recovery area on my back. There is gauze and tape where the I.V. needle was positioned in my arm the last time I looked. The nurse walks over and tells me they are finished, raises the back of my bed and asks if I would like something to drink. The entire procedure between those two points is a total blank. Thirty minutes later I’m at home on the couch reading a Harlan Ellison paperback. The worst part by far was the cleansing and fasting beforehand.

And oh by the way, everything was “normal”. They didn’t find anything to worry about.


About Marcus

Who me? Introverted, neurotic, self-absorbed, increasingly cynical observer of human nature and part time social critic in hiding. Most of my life spent avoiding growing up. The naive idealistic passions of youth have evolved into the eclectic eccentricities of adulthood. Northeast Florida small-town native, related to people I can't relate to. Simultaneously my own best friend and worst enemy. Politically and spiritually unaffiliated, my personal ideologies put me all over the map or off it completely.
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4 Responses to I think I’ll live

  1. sosoclever says:

    The blogger formerly known as onyxblue1
    (I had a couple of honest-to-goodness stalkers last year, and now gathers dust.)
    I don’t care how little you were aware of what they were doing. I’m not running off to the hospital to have one of those done. Glad to know everything’s all right, though.
    I haven’t given in yet and watched that Dr. Horrible thing, but I imagine eventually I will. Lots of people talk about how wonderful it is. Rocket Ace has a few shorts up on their website, but I wish they’d get a new serial going. I miss Cerealized and Dead End Days.

    • marcsuttle says:

      Re: The blogger formerly known as onyxblue1
      Dr Horrible started and continued well thru Act II but Act III was sorta predictable. Some of the Rocket Ace stuff was enjoyable. Besides ‘History’s Greatest Pervs’ I enjoyed ‘The Waldo Ultimatum’ the most.

  2. cwmackowski says:

    Glad to hear it all went well.

  3. I’ve yet to schedule my first one, now two years past the magic “Happy 50th” birthday celebration, and it’s totally because of the fasting/cleansing part. Damm.
    Congrats on the normal results, and here’s hoping there’s lots of time to piss away that retirement money on stuff you love.

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