menial mental spring cleaning

Do materialistic people reach a point when they stopping wishing for more, more, more and begin to worry about who is going to end up with all their stuff when they die? Are both viewpoints selfish?

Conversation Killer: About once a week someone will ask me if I watch this-or-that program which requires cable or satellite TV. When I tell them I don’t have either things come to a stop. (as more people find out I have a restored 1960’s Muscle car why do they automatically assume I watch the Barrett-Jackson auto auction on TV?)

Why have I put more thought into turning 50 this year than all of my other “milestone” birthdays combined? I’m reminded of standup comedian/actor Larry Miller and his routine about how we look at birthdays at different ages. I’m looking forward to 50 as a positive thing but I haven’t been able to put the reason why into words.

I haven’t been to a baptism, wedding or funeral in so long I’m having trouble remembering which one I did last. Funny, as I get older funerals seems to get less frequent when you would expect the opposite.

Acted as best man at a co-workers wedding once without a clue to the obligations of my role – I was there and that’s about it. They ended up divorced and I lost contact with both parties. Must have been something I neglected to do, like offering a toast for a successful marriage.

Opinion: Successful relationships (of any type) are mostly luck. Too many variables for one person to control so you might as well go with the flow. Not that I believe in predestination, fate, karma, etc. but for whatever reason some people are luckier than others.


About Marcus

Who me? Introverted, neurotic, self-absorbed, increasingly cynical observer of human nature and part time social critic in hiding. Most of my life spent avoiding growing up. The naive idealistic passions of youth have evolved into the eclectic eccentricities of adulthood. Northeast Florida small-town native, related to people I can't relate to. Simultaneously my own best friend and worst enemy. Politically and spiritually unaffiliated, my personal ideologies put me all over the map or off it completely.
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4 Responses to menial mental spring cleaning

  1. ikahana says:

    The more always needs to be updated, especially since the last 50 years seem to have been about learning how to make things with as limited a life as possible and still appear to be neccesary, so that they will need to be replaced. Add to that the fact that the need to stay cool now follows people outside of their adolescence, beyond young adulthood, into ages where we should be – historically – more “what the fuck” about it all.
    Still a few years before I turn 50, and while I’m not looking forward to a big part of it (being closer to death, being older in health terms), I’m looking forward to having another division between myself and the lifeforce that seems so sucked into consuming sheeps of ever changing hipness, although that sounds more bitter and gives me more credit than is appropriate.

    • marcsuttle says:

      Recently, except for ongoing book buying binges, I’ve managed to put a cap on most of my “gotta have more” habit. I keep having to remind myself that once I had just a small fraction of what I possess today and yet was completely happy at the time. What I find myself holding onto the tightest (and treasuring the most) were items as old (or older) than I am that just aren’t made any more yet remain completely functional for the purpose they were intended. I’d like to think “what the fuck” IS the new “cool”, but probably would be outvoted by the disposable-oriented consumer masses.

  2. mary919 says:

    — I’m sort of excited about my 20 yr anniversary at work, but I’m *not* looking forward to turning 50. The only good thing I can come up with is that it might rate a big party– if you’re into that sort of thing. If you figure out why you’re looking forward to it, let me know! I have a few more years to convince myself.
    — I was just thinking today about how I have a God-son I haven’t seen in about three years. And I haven’t talked to his parents either. But there was a time when we were all very close. Being an adult is odd– people drift in & out of your life and no one really stresses about it. Except my parents– I swear they keep up with every person they’ve ever met. It makes me tired just hearing about it.
    — Television is something that a lot of people have in common, that’s all. What I think is very funny is those people who *DO* have cable or satellite or whatever but say “Oh, I never watch television– it’s so nasty!!” but then know every current plot and all the funny commercials. Why pay for something so nasty? Buncha liars.
    — I do sometimes worry about who will have to clean out our attic after we die. There’s nothing good up there– just a bunch of crap. And none of it’s organized. But I don’t think that’s what you meant 🙂

    • marcsuttle says:

      A lot of my attitude about 50 has to do with being healthy enough to still do whatever I feel like. I’m somewhat surprised after watching so many adults I knew as a kid turn into old grumpy farts once they got beyond 40. The fact that I’ve remained in touch with my inner child at age 49 gives me hope for the future. Once you reach 50 your choice to act like a teenager is exempted from the usual rules against such behavior I think.
      No big party here unless I throw it myself and invite a bunch of folks whom I would marginally classify at best as “people I know”. That part IS sort of depressing now that I think about it, thank you very much.
      Without kids and not thinking we can spend all of it(but we’re gonna try), the question becomes which of the fours nieces and two nephews do we like the best or is charitable donations a better idea?

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