and so it begins

Retrieving today’s newspaper I immediately noticed its bulk. After reading the usual sections of interest (headlines, local, opinion, obits and comics) during breakfast, it crossed my mind to weigh this prize catch to see if it would qualify as the largest non-Sunday edition. Out came the digital bathroom scales purchased five years ago for the purpose of checking weight gain of our newborn puppies. (accurate to 1/10 of a pound)

News, sports, business, entertainment and classifieds – 1 lb.

All the adverts for tomorrow’s holiday shopping start – 4 lbs.

We have a winner! (the pulpwood industry)

(FYI – I weighed 156 lbs. At 5′ 11″ I probably won’t hear any words of sympathy, but that’s the most I’ve ever weighed.)

Advertisements

About Marcus

Who me? Introverted, neurotic, self-absorbed, increasingly cynical observer of human nature and part time social critic in hiding. Most of my life spent avoiding growing up. The naive idealistic passions of youth have evolved into the eclectic eccentricities of adulthood. Northeast Florida small-town native, related to people I can't relate to. Simultaneously my own best friend and worst enemy. Politically and spiritually unaffiliated, my personal ideologies put me all over the map or off it completely.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to and so it begins

  1. mrsmartian says:

    (FYI – I weighed 156 lbs. At 5′ 11″ I probably won’t hear any words of sympathy, but that’s the most I’ve ever weighed.)
    Yeah, but were you holding the paper at the time?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s