a thought for the holidays

(this comes from “The Writer’s Almanac”, a daily email newsletter from Minnesota Public Radio)

“Pre-Holiday PMS,” by Ginger Andrews, from An Honest Answer

I don’t want to be thankful this year.
I don’t want to eat turkey and I could care
if I never again tasted
your mother’s cornbread stuffing.
I hate sweet potato pie. I hate mini marshmallows.
I hate doing dishes while you watch football.

I hate Christmas. I hate name-drawing.
I hate tree-trimming, gift-wrapping,
and Rudolph the zipper-necked red-nosed reindeer.
I just want to skip the whole merry mess–
unless, of course, you’d like to try
to change my mind. You could start
by telling me I’m pretty and leaving me
your charge cards
and all your cash.


About Marcus

Who me? Introverted, neurotic, self-absorbed, increasingly cynical observer of human nature and part time social critic in hiding. Most of my life spent avoiding growing up. The naive idealistic passions of youth have evolved into the eclectic eccentricities of adulthood. Northeast Florida small-town native, related to people I can't relate to. Simultaneously my own best friend and worst enemy. Politically and spiritually unaffiliated, my personal ideologies put me all over the map or off it completely.
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2 Responses to a thought for the holidays

  1. mrsmartian says:

    This one’s a contender for the Things-I-Wish-I’d-Said List.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Very true!
    I can’t think of anything that would relieve my PMS faster!

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